The lament psalms show us that the best thing to do with difficult emotions is to run to God. In the laments, we see that God welcomes us to express our hearts honestly to him and to look to him for help. In this activity, we use the psalms of lament to help us express our own difficult emotions and situations to God.
Step 1 – How am I doing?
Start by committing the time to God in prayer. Pause and consider how you are doing right now – what is the current state of your heart? Write down the specific emotions that you have been experiencing recently. If you are not entirely sure how you are doing, or what emotions are present for you right now, consider what is going on in your life. Are there any situations that are especially dominant, or have there been difficult events or circumstances recently? You may want to jot down a few notes for yourself about the major emotions and circumstances impacting you currently. As you consider the difficult emotions on your heart, these may be related to your personal situation, or it may be emotions on behalf of another, or on behalf of a larger situation going on in your community or the world. It is also possible to have strong feelings but be unsure of their source or cause. All of these are appropriate to bring to God through lament.
In this process of reflection, remember two important truths. First, the goal of this activity is not to make ourselves feel sad. The goal is simply to take the emotions we have, or the feelings surrounding certain situations, and bring them honestly to God. So don’t try to manufacture any specific emotion. Second, we need to be honest with ourselves – sometimes we avoid, hide, or bury the difficult emotions and circumstances we face. Rather than gloss over the difficult pieces we have long avoided, it can be helpful to pause for a moment of prayer – “Lord, is now a good time to bring you these hurts and griefs?” Honest lament is a critical tool for walking through such long avoided sorrows, and it sets us on the path with Jesus toward renewed hope.
Step 2 – Connect with the Lament Psalms
There are two different options for completing this step, choose one of them. The first option is to choose a single psalm that relates to the current state of your heart. A list of different lament psalms categorized by dominant emotion is provided to help you with picking a psalm. In the second option, you may choose different phrases from a variety of psalms that connect with your current emotions and situation.
Option 1: Choose a Psalm
After you have had some time to reflect on your heart and life situation, look at the section titled Lament Psalms Sorted by Emotion and find a psalm that seems helpful or that mirrors your own emotions.
Slowly read through the entirety of the psalm. Pay attention to how the psalmist expresses the following components. It may be helpful to make notes of the verses or specific phrases that resonate with your own heart and situation. How does the psalmist:
- Turn to God in their sorrows?
- Express their complaint to God?
- Ask boldly for God’s help?
- Choose to trust in the midst of difficulty?
Option 2: Choose Phrases from Many Psalms
Turn to the section titled Lament Passages Sorted by Type. Read through the four categories (Turn to God, Bring Your Complaint, Ask Boldly, and Choose to Trust) and choose at least one phrase/passage from each category that relates to how you feel or to your situation. Feel free to choose many phrases from a single category. If a specific passage strikes you as particularly relevant, considering turning to that psalm and reading the context. Look to see if there are any other parts of that psalm that might help you express your own lament to the Lord. As you select helpful passages and phrases, write these down so that you can use them in your own prayer in the next step.
Step 3 – Cry out to the Lord
Use the different lament components of the psalm to help you cry out to God in your own sorrows and situation. We recommend writing out or journaling this prayer, much like the psalmists wrote out their prayers and laments to God. This often helps clarify what we are seeking to express and also allows you to look back on it later, and even use it again. If you do not wish, or are unable, to write out your lament, consider praying it out loud to the Lord.
As you pray and lament, there may be times you want to quote a psalm word for word. There may also be times where you want to paraphrase and expand upon a psalm in order to express clearly your own heart and difficult emotions.
Whether you write your prayer, or pray it out loud, you can follow the general pattern:
- Turn to God – Address your prayer to God and cry out to him.
- Bring your Complaint – Express in specific terms the feelings and situations you’re facing.
- Ask Boldly – Bring your requests to God. How do you need him to act?
- Choose to Trust – Reaffirm your trust in God, in his power and goodness.
If you would like to give some more structure to this activity, try using the Learning-to-Lament Worksheet.